I'm happy to be sitting here, reporting that Mr. Hyde has left the building. Today has been a really good day, relatively speaking. In one of my previous posts, I believe I said that it was a good one for me to go back and read on my worst days...and I did...and it helped me, emotionally. When I am at my worst, I wouldn't remember if I had a decent day the day before. It is too overwhelming.
It took a couple of days, but I am back on the blog. Over the past days, I couldn't imagine coming back. I honestly thought that I could not do this balancing act of deciding how much to share. It is so hard walking the thin line between a pity party and keeping my friends and family informed. I am trying not to get carried away writing about my daily ups and downs. (ADD hiccup - today, I wanted to write "wine" on our list for the store and when I looked at it, it said "whine", hhhmmmm, a hint Mr. Freud?) sorry for the diversion Chris ;)
For the chronically ill that are following, specifically the ones I haven't met, I do know how important it is to see all sides...again, the good, the bad and the ugly. (ADD hiccup..when I met with my new UM immunologist, I told her that I can't believe how ugly I am and she said "I know"..OUCH....WHAT, WHAT..!!! HOWEVER, she continued to say that I have an ugly disease and it shows all over..and it really does, I am unrecognizable)
Over the past several years, I have tuned in to shows highlighting chronically ill people. I would watch, sitting on the edge of my seat, so anxious to hear their issues/coping skills. In most, if not all cases, they would sugar coat the story. The ill person is always in full make up, hair recently styled, showing how loverly their lives can be. Everyone's situation is different and there are highlights in everyone's life, no matter how small. Howevaaahh, speaking for myself, I watched the shows to see how sick they really were and how they coped. They NEVER "go there".
"Oops, I Did It Again".....took me all this time to tell you that I am just going to continue along the same path that I have begun, until I feel the need to do otherwise, which didn't even need to be said! I am not going to smother you all with the grim details, however, I will let you know when it is unbearable. I want the chronically ill that are following to know I am legitimate, which I hope will then allow them to relax and enjoy my lighter posts.
Sooo, I am trying to work on my diet. At the suggestion of a friend, also with autoimmune issues, I am trying to implement a gluten free diet with my diabetes diet. I spent a week trying to learn about it and working some new appropriate foods in to my daily life. There were some hits and some misses. The biggest miss was pasta made with rice flour - UGH!!!! As it cooked, the water looked exactly like wallpaper paste - not something this gnocchi loving girl wants to see. At this point, I feel like I have a good enough grasp on this plan and beginning today, I am incorporating it with the diabetes diet.
Today I felt up to cooking. It worked well, because I broke up the "prep" in to a few different stages. I was vertical, then horizontal, then vertical, then horizontal, then vertical, then actually sat and ate at the table. I will only tackle easy to prepare dinners, but even at that, I usually have to break it up throughout the afternoon. After dinner, it was back in bed until now.
I know this isn't an action packed post, but I needed to get back in the saddle again.....and it feels soooo good!
Oh no, I already have "Back in the Saddle" going on a continuous loop in my head ..hope it doesn't happen to you guys!
Cathy- I prayed for you today and the one thing I have been thinking about is diet. When I had cancer the diet that pulled me through was a diet of lower and good carbs along with lots of vegetables. If you can eat lots of veggies, it will make you look healthier. I know the difference when I eat right which means for me no dairy, no sugar, no alcohal, sounds like no fun! However, I feel better. Of course the diet is called the beauty diet and it is not at all easy. I cheat all the time because you cannot have anything with vinegar or carbonated or lunchmeat, or beef; however, it really does work. I cannot find the book; however, I will e-mail you the diet no reply necessary. Tomorrow, I wanted to do two things when I got home today and I still have not done them. Love Carol
ReplyDeleteBack in the Saddle on a continuous loop eh? Gene Autry or Aerosmith? GBG
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